Me, myself and I

There's no layouts, no altered art, no nothing today. I just wanna de-stress and grumble on my blog. I mean, its not like THE blog where the whole world reads about me. So I guess its safe to grumble...... (Coz a fren of mine nearly got sued by the sister in law for grumbling about the mother in law....jeez...)
I am deleting and deleting what I type. This is the fourth time I'm "throwing" my post into the bin. I really dont know where to start. Most of my headaches and troubles are the results of decisions that I've made and I'm not happy that I've made these decisions. But how do I get out of it? I really dont know if I've made the correct decisions and whether I can get out of the situation I'm in if the decision I've made is really wrong.
But do we always make the correct decisions? What happens when whatever we've decided turns out to be wrong? How come I keep making the wrong choices my whole life? Is it me? Do I have a problem making decisions? Why did a seemingly good idea become bad? Have I been misled or did I mislead myself? Am I delusional? All the questions and no apparent answers.
I like a carefree life. Some call it lazy life. I dont see anything wrong with it. I am not the kind to make big bucks or climb coporate ladders. I dont like to work very hard. I work because I have to, not because I like to. Lazy? Yeap, for sure. But I'm happy. But now, I am facing a crisis. I cant get out of the work that I have to do because I promised I'd do it. But I was not shown the whole picture of what I had to do. I am capable of doing it. I just dont want to. Dilemma, is what I'm in right now. Getting out, is what I'd like right now.
Sigh..........